The Dangerous Book for Boys Page 3

  Ideally, you’ll want to get started on a quiet street lined with maples and stoops, with windows far enough away to avoid breakage but close enough for your mother to call you in for dinner. An empty lot can work just as well. Stickball is great for pickup games. You’ll find that passersby, particularly those of a certain age well beyond boyhood, will often beg for a turn at bat.

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  Equipment:

  Bats: The bat you use can be any length, but shouldn’t be very wide. It must be made only of wood, although some tape around the handle is allowed. A broom handle is the ideal stickball bat.

  Balls: A spaldeen, a.k.a. Spalding High-Bounce Ball, which is made from the insides of a tennis ball.

  Chalk

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  PLAYING FIELD:

  Stickball is typically played in a paved empty schoolyard or a city block. Be careful: the ball can bounce a lot farther than you’d expect!

  RULES OF THE GAME:

  Use the basic rules of baseball, but remember that you can adapt the game according to the terrain, as long as all team members are in agreement. Some players run bases like you would for baseball, while others decide hits by how far the ball travels, in which case the batter does not have to run.

  The biggest difference between baseball and stickball is how you manage balls and strikes. Each batter has only two swings at a ball, and fouls are considered strikes. (Cars, manholes, and fire hydrants can all be used as bases or foul lines. Strike-outs (a fly ball that is caught by a member of the opposing team) or fielder outs (a grounder caught by a member of the opposing team) can both count as outs, depending on the rules you and your teammates agree on.

  If the ball flies into a forbidden area or breaks a window, some people call it an automatic out while others will give you a home run: Make sure you decide on the house rules before there is any occasion for disagreement—or it may become necessary to flee the vicinity.

  Depending on where you’re playing—and how many players you have—you can choose to play fast pitch, slow pitch, or fungo.

  Fast pitch (1–3 players per side): Best played in a yard or area with a wall or a fence to use as a backstop. Draw a rectangle on the pavement as a strike zone. The pitcher throws the ball baseball style, making this the most demanding style of play.

  Slow pitch (3–8 players per side): A fine street game. The pitcher is at least 40 feet away from the batter. The batter hits the spaldeen after it bounces once.

  Fungo (3–8 players per side): This is the way the leagues play nowadays. No pitcher is required. Batter tosses the ball and then hits it on the way down or after one or more bounces.

  If the ball flies into a forbidden area or breaks a window, some people call it an automatic out while others will give you a home run. Make sure you agree on the house rules before there is any occasion for disagreement or it becomes necessary to flee the vicinity.

  Fossils

  HALF A BILLION YEARS ago there was no life on land and only worms, snails, sponges, and primitive crabs in the seas. When these creatures died, their bodies sank into silt and mud and were slowly covered. Over millions of years, the sea bottom hardened into rock and the minerals of the bones were replaced, molecule by molecule, with rock-forming minerals such as iron and silica.

  Eventually, this process turns the bones into rock—and they become known as fossils, a slowly created cast of an animal that died hundreds of millions of years ago. Other fossils are formed when dying animals fall into peat bogs or are covered in sand. As each new sedimentary layer takes millions of years to form, we can judge the age of the fossils from their depth. You can travel in time, in fact, if you have a spade.

  Those sea animals can move a long way in the time since they were swimming in dark oceans! Geological action can raise great plates of the earth so that what were undersea fossils can be found at the peak of a mountain or in a desert that was once a valley on the seafloor.

  In parts of New Zealand, you can see the fossilized remains of ancient prehistoric forests in visible black bands on the seashore. This particular compressed material is coal and it burns extremely well as fuel. Oil, too, is a fossil. It is formed in pockets, under great pressure, from animals and plants that lived three hundred million years ago. It is without a doubt the most useful substance we have ever found—everything plastic comes from oil, as well as gas for our planes and cars.

  By studying fossilized plants and animals, we can take a glimpse at a world that has otherwise vanished. It is a narrow view and the information is nowhere near as complete as we would like, but our understanding improves with every new find.

  Even the commonest fossils can be fascinating. Hold a piece of flint up to the light and see creatures that last crawled before man came out of the caves—before Nelson, before William the Conqueror, before Moses. It fires the imagination.

  Here are some of the classic forms of fossils.

  Ammonite. A shelled sea creature that died out 65 million years ago (see Dinosaurs). Sizes vary enormously, but they can be attractively coloured.

  Trilobite. These are also a fairly common find, though the rock must usually be split to see them. Fossil hunters carry small hammers to tap away at samples of rock.

  Sea urchin. Fossilized sea urchins and simple organisms like starfish are all very well and good, but remnants of three types of mammoths—the Columbian mammoth, Jefferson’s mammoth, and the woolly mammoth—have been found in North America. In fact, we have more types of dinosaurs than any other continent or country. You are not likely to find an intact Tyrannosaurus skeleton, but with a little luck you should be able to search out a trilobite fossil.

  Building a Treehouse

  LET’S BE BLUNT. Building a decent treehouse is really hard. It takes something like sixty man-hours start to finish and can cost more than $200 in wood and materials. In other words, it’s a job for dads. You could spend the same amount on a video-game console and a few games, but the treehouse won’t go out of date—and is healthier, frankly. We are well aware of the satisfaction gained from nailing bits of wood to a tree, but for something that looks right, is strong and safe, and will last more than just a few months, you need a bit more than that.

  Along with a canoe or a small sailing dinghy, a treehouse is still one of the best things you could possibly have. It’s worth the effort, the sweat, the cost, even the blood if whoever builds it is careless with power tools. It is a thing of beauty. It really should have a skull and crossbones on it somewhere, as well.

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  You will need

  Thirty 6-inch (15 cm) box head wood screws with heavy square washers.

  Eight 8-inch (20 cm) box head wood screws with washers.

  Thirty-two 4-inch (10 cm) box head wood screws with washers.

  4 × 3 inch beams—at least 16 ft, but better to get 20 ft (6 m).

  2 × 6 inch (5 × 15 cm) pine planking—64 ft (19.5 m).

  2 × 4 timber for roof joists and walls—32 ft + 152 ft (10 m + 46 m): 184 ft (56 m).

  Pine decking to cover the area of the platform—49 sq ft (4.5 sq m).

  Pine decking for the ladder—27 sq ft (2.5 sq m).

  Jigsaw power tool, electric drill, rip saw. (Preferably an electric table saw.)

  Level.

  Large drill bits of 14, 16, and 18 mm.

  Stepladder and a long ladder.

  Safety rope.

  Bag of roofing nails and a hammer.

  Plywood—enough to cover four half walls with a total area of 84 sq ft (7.8 sq m). Add in approximately 49 sq ft (4.5 sq m) for the roof.

  Ratchet with a set of heads to tighten the hex head wood screws.

  Chisel to cut trenches for the trapdoor hinges. Two hinges.

  Four eyebolts that can be screwed into the trunk.

  Cloth bag for trapdoor counterweight.

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  To build the platform, you need some 2 × 6 inch (5 × 15 cm) pine planking, available from any large wood supplier. Our base was 7 ft by 7
ft (2.1 m × 2.1 m) and that worked out as eight 7 ft (2.1 m) lengths, with one more for bracers. Altogether: 64 ft (19.5 m) of 2 × 6.

  Most dads will be concerned with making this as safe as possible. You really don’t want something this heavy to fall down with children in it. Wherever possible, we went for huge overkill with materials, working on the principle that in the event of nuclear war, this treehouse would remain standing.

  Choose your tree and check if the treehouse will overlook a neighbor’s garden. If it does and they object, you could be asked to take it down again. Choose the height of the base from the ground. This will depend in part on the age of the children, but we put ours eight feet up. Higher ones are more impressive, of course, but are harder to make. If the ground is soft, use a board to stop the feet of the ladders from sinking in.

  THE PLATFORM

  The box head screws need to have holes pre-drilled, so make sure you have a suitable drill bit and a long enough extension lead to reach the tree. We ended up using three leads attached to each other and a double socket on the end. For a previous job, we had attached a table saw to an old table and it proved extremely useful to be able to cut wood as required.

  Build the platform as shown in the diagrams below. Use the safety rope to support the planks until they are secure, putting the rope over a higher branch and tying it off when they are in position. Do not try and walk on the platform before it is supported at each corner. For it to drop, it would have to sheer off a number of steel box head screws, but the turning force of someone standing on a corner is immense and could be disastrous. Supporting the platform is technically the hardest part of the job.

  SUPPORTING THE PLATFORM

  Beams measuring 4 × 3 inches (10 × 7.5 cm) are immensely strong—probably far too strong for the job. Given that the trunk is likely to be uneven, they will almost certainly have to be different lengths. First cut them roughly to size, being generous. The hard part is cutting the join where the top of the beam meets the platform.

  The strength comes from the fact that the platform sits on a flat surface at all four corners. The joint for this looks a little like a bird’s open mouth. Cut it by hand, marking it out carefully. The first task is cutting a ninety-degree triangle with two saw lines.

  Mark a point 4 inches (10 cm) from the end on both sides, then draw a line to it from the opposite edge. Repeat to give you two diagonal lines. Where they meet is a neat center point. Measure it all twice. Cut from the edge inward.

  The second and spatially trickier cut is straight down on one of the cut edges. Again, measure carefully and cut. It might be worth practicing on a bit of scrap wood first. You should end up with four ends that fit neatly inside the corner of the main platform and support it as well.

  Eight-inch (20 cm) hex head screws might seem excessive to attach the four diagonals to the trunk, but everything rests on them. Drill through the four-inch length of the diagonal beam so another four inches of steel goes into the tree. Don’t worry, you won’t kill it. Trees are very resilient and a good pruning does more damage than this.

  When the four diagonals are in place, the platform cannot tip without actually crushing one of them. This is practically impossible. We tested the strength by putting six adults up in the finished treehouse, with a combined total of more than 840 lbs (380 kg).

  We used offcuts of 2 × 6 to add bracers to any spare gap in the platform. Rather than our usual overkill, this was to support the decking. Make sure you leave a gap for the trapdoor. We used standard pine decking available from any home improvement store. It has the advantage of being treated against damp—as were all the timbers here. Getting them treated is a little more expensive but makes the difference between a treehouse lasting ten years and twenty. We screwed the decking straight into the bracers and main beams of the platform, using a jigsaw to shape it around the actual trunk. Leave a little gap to allow for tree movement and somewhere to sweep dust and dead leaves.

  THE WALLS

  It is easiest to assemble these rectangles on the ground, then hoist them into place. That said, they are extremely heavy, so use ropes and two people at least. Do not attempt to lift the section without it being held by a strong rope.

  For each wall, 4 × 2 inch (10 × 5 cm) beams were used, with 4-inch box head screws holding them together. We planned to cover the lower half of each wall with overlapping shed planking, except for one left open with just wire to stop the children from falling through. It was absolutely crucial to have a drill powerful enough to send screws straight into the wood without predrilling. If we’d had to drill every hole first, we’d probably still be there now.

  The shape was a simple rectangle with a ledge and a couple of support uprights. When you are deciding how tall it should be, remember that it is a treehouse for children. We went with five feet six inches, which was probably generous.

  Each wall just sat on top of the decking and was screwed into it from above. Please note that it is going to feel wobbly at this stage. The four walls all support each other and when the last one is put in place, it becomes extremely solid. The roof will also add stability.

  Also note that two of the walls will be shorter than the other two, so plan and measure these carefully or you’ll have an awful time. You may also have trouble with the heads of the hex wood screws getting in the way. Although it’s time-consuming, you may have to countersink these with a ¾ inch (16/18 mm) wood drill bit. As well as the four-inch box head screws, we used four six-inch bolts and nuts to bring the sides together.

  THE ROOF

  Once the four walls are in place and solid, you can think about the roof. We used eight joists of 2 × 4. The length will depend on the angles involved, but allow at least four feet for each one.

  Cut them roughly to size, then take out a triangle near the end so that they will fit neatly over the top corner of the walls. In theory, this is the exact opposite of the lower diagonals, but we didn’t think it was worth cutting more “bird-mouth” joints.

  Measure and cut very carefully here as one end will be in contact with an uneven trunk. Use six-inch hex wood screws (8) to anchor them to the tree. The roof supports only its own weight.

  After placing the four diagonal joists for the corners, add four more between them, one to a side. Use a level to be certain they are all at the same height, or your roof will be uneven.

  There are various ways of finishing a roof, of course. We used a plastic roof membrane tacked to the eight joists with roofing nails. Over that, we nailed strips of plywood. It looked very natural, but each piece had to be cut to size and then taken up the tree. We also nailed very thin battens on the diagonals for cosmetic effect.

  The roof was probably the most time-consuming part of the whole process—and a good safety rope at that height was absolutely crucial. In fact, to reach the highest point of the roof, we had to stand on the window ledges, make a loop out of the rope, and sit on the loop as we leaned out. To say the very least, this is extremely dangerous and for adults only.

  Finally, we used the same overlapping planking to cover the lower half of the walls, then made a ladder out of decking planking. We attached the top of the ladder with loose bolts on the basis that it could be pulled up at some point in the future. It probably never will be, though—far too heavy.

  We made the trapdoor from offcuts of decking and some pine planking, screwing it all together. To pull the trapdoor closed behind you, a piece of rope hanging from an eyebolt is perfect.

  To prevent the trapdoor dropping on small fingers, it’s worthwhile counterweighting it. To do this, get yourself a cloth bag of the sort you sometimes get shoes in. Run a rope through the trapdoor, with the knot on the underside. The other end should go through an eyebolt higher up the trunk and a third one out on the wall. Tie the bag of stones to the end and leave it dangling where the children can reach it. To open the trapdoor from below, they can pull on the bag. To close it, they pull on the knotted rope hanging down from the trapdoor. You’ll have to ad
just the weight of the bag to suit the child, of course, and it means the trapdoor has to be pressed shut with a foot when you’re up there, but it’s much safer.

  The important thing when it’s all done is to wait for a nice summer evening, take some cushions, blankets, and a flashlight and spend the night up there under the stars. Take snacks—all that fresh air will give you an appetite.

  The Rules of Soccer

  NEATLY ENOUGH, there are only seventeen main laws for the most popular game on earth. These are based on rules put together in England where the same is called football as far back as 1863 and formally ratified by the International Football Association Board in 1886.

  The pitch. Length: 100–130 yds (90 m–120 m). Width: 50–100 yds (45 m–90 m). The two long lines are called touchlines, the two short lines are called goal lines. The pitch is divided by a halfway line, with a center point where the “kickoff” occurs to begin the match. At each goal, there is a 6-yard box (5.5 m) known as the goal area. Outside that, there is an 18-yard box (16.5 m) known as the penalty area. A penalty spot is drawn 12 yards (11 m) in front of the goalposts. The goalposts are 8 yards (7.32 m) apart and 8 ft (2.44 m) high.

  The ball. Circumference: between 27 and 28 inches (68–70 cm). Weight: between 14 and 16 oz (410–450 g).

  The teams. No more than eleven players can be fielded by each team, including the goalkeeper. Depending on the competition, between three and seven substitutes can be used. In addition, any player can change places with the goalkeeper provided that the referee is told and the change occurs while play has stopped.